Gory Girl Movie Reviews

Machete

Grizzled and beloved character actor Danny Trejo plays the title role in Robert Rodriguez’s newest creation Machete. The plot revolves around Machete Cortez, a former Mexican Federale with a heart of gold who resides in Texas illegally. While just trying to blend in with other illegal immigrants, he haphazardly gets caught up with some interesting characters who are involved in some shady business. The result is an entertaining and bloody commentary on the US’s policy on immigration.

After appearing as a fake trailer in the 2007 gorefest Grindhouse, Machete continues with the grimy B movie exploitation style first introduced in the trailer. The all-star cast includes Robert DeNiro, Jessica Alba, Steven Segal, Lindsay Lohan, Don Johnson, Michelle Rodriguez and Cheech Marin.

This film is full of hilariously cheesy one-liners, beautiful women, and some of the best blood and guts scenes I have seen in a long time. It is definitely not for everyone, but I would see it again for sure. Then again, I am a sucker for Danny Trejo. It’s hard not to love him.

I am happy to say that it looks like Machete is the first in a trilogy. Look for Machete Kills and Machete Kills Again in theatres in the next few years.

Despicable Me

In a happy suburban neighborhood surrounded by white picket fences with flowering rose bushes, sits a black house with a dead lawn. Unbeknownst to the neighbors, hidden beneath this home is a vast secret hideout. Surrounded by a small army of minions, we discover Gru (voiced by Steve Carell), planning the biggest heist in the history of the world. He is going to steal the moon. (Yes, the moon!) Gru delights in all things wicked. Armed with his arsenal of shrink rays, freeze rays, and battle-ready vehicles for land and air, he vanquishes all who stand in his way. Until the day he encounters the immense will of three little orphaned girls who look at him and see something that no one else has ever seen: a potential Dad. The world's greatest villain has just met his greatest challenge: three little girls named Margo, Edith and Agnes.

This was the cutest damn movie and I certainly needed to laugh and it did just that

I would totally see it again. Russell Brand played an old professor and was funny as Hell. Steve Carell was also fantastic as the voice of Gru. This movie was well worth the money, and it will really brighten up your day if you decide on an afternoon matinee like I did.

Inception

This is my must see movie of the year so far!

I was stressed out the entire movie and don't think I relaxed until it was over. The writing was complex but I didn't find the story line hard to follow at all. The different layers had their own look and merged together beautifully. From conception to execution the movie was made brilliantly and I thoroughly enjoyed the dreamy ride that Chris Nolan created.

The last time a movie was this cool was the Matrix, but being that the actors involved in this are top notch this is a far better experience. The special effects and stages that were built to pull off some of the scenes made this the coolest movie this year and I can safely say that I will be returning to see it again in the theatre.

Dom Cobb is a skilled thief, the absolute best in the dangerous art of extraction, stealing valuable secrets from deep within the subconscious during the dream state, when the mind is at its most vulnerable. Cobb's rare ability has made him a coveted player in this treacherous new world of corporate espionage, but it has also made him an international fugitive and cost him everything he has ever loved.

Now Cobb is being offered a chance at redemption. One last job could give him his life back but only if he can accomplish the impossible-inception. Instead of the perfect heist, Cobb and his team of specialists have to pull off the reverse: their task is not to steal an idea but to plant one. If they succeed, it could be the perfect crime. But no amount of careful planning or expertise can prepare the team for the dangerous enemy that seems to predict their every move.

An enemy that only Cobb could have seen coming...